Failing to find the time of your life at college? You're not alone.
Robert Medhurst used up much of his first week at university looking at social media, reading posts about other students' fun nights out.
"I remained in my room," Robert recalls, characterizing that period as the loneliest time of his life.
The people he lived with seldom socialized, and his program didn't seem very sociable.
Although he tried by attending trial events for different clubs, he was unable to locate like-minded individuals.
"I began losing my confidence," he says. "I believed individuals didn't desire to be friends with me, or they didn't appreciate me."
Social Media Comparisons
Originally, Robert had no intention of attending college and was offered positions for post-secondary education.
But then he observed his peers having great fun as university attendees on social media.
"When you must rise for work on Thursday at 9:00 and you observe peers partied on the previous evening, you begin believing situations appear superior," Robert says.
Higher Education Assumptions
Media content and social media can glorify the idea of college existence.
Lots of people arrive at college with strong assumptions for what they imagine could be the greatest period of their lives.
Some students come to university with "rose-tinted glasses," says a support services coordinator.
Research Results
- Through surveys of new students initially, students' biggest concern was fitting in and finding acceptance
- Additional research through polling organizations, 17% of students said they lacked friendships at university
- Over one-third reported they worried daily or weekly about making friends
Individual Stories
Alisha Miah's online videos was filled with content of students enjoying themselves while cohabitating in college residences.
But when she transferred from her hometown to university to pursue media studies, she found freshers' week "intense" because of the substance involvement it involved.
She abstains from alcohol and had never been clubbing before.
"I utilized much of orientation inside my accommodation," she says. "I simply experienced a bit alienated."
Psychological Aspects
In a 2025 survey of more than 10,000 university attendees, a significant portion mentioned they contemplated dropping out.
The most common reason was emotional state, accompanied by financial concerns.
"Anxiety about these multiple factors is extremely prevalent, and typical," adds a counselling expert.
Finding Solutions
Eventually, all three individuals eventually adapted and formed relationships.
She built connections through her course and using online platforms, while another student became more content when she could to share accommodation with peers.
Useful Suggestions
Regarding his experience, now 24 and in his concluding studies, it was participating in theater activities and getting a part-time job that supported social connection.
The suggested approach to beginning learners finding social interaction difficult is to simply leave your accommodation and go to club and society taster events.
"Subsequent to periods of consistently showing up, others notice your presence," he explains, "you notice their presence, and relationships start developing."
